


I Feel Like I'm Drowning

by kyunchang



Category: K-pop, The Rose (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, Lee Jaehyeong as the biggest asshole ever, M/M, Mild Smut, Save Hajoon 2k18
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-05-24 11:09:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14953551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyunchang/pseuds/kyunchang
Summary: "all of this, is hajoons choice. he wants me. not you. and it's going to stay that way the longer your stupid little friend believes i like him." jaehyeong said, loud and clear. his voice running cold. he pushed through them, walking a good distance infront of them before turning around, a sickening smirk plastered on his face."remember this, love birds, i don't do relationships." and with that, he stalked off and around the corner of the street.it was then that they realized this wasn't going to end pretty....Alternatively;;  Being swept up in Jaehyeongs life wasn't the plan for Hajoon, and his once calm life came crashing down the moment he let himself fall for those deep brown eyes of his.





	1. PLAYLIST |

**— FEEL LIKE IM DROWNING**  
two feet  
**— BABY DONT STOP**  
nct  
**— LOVE IS A BITCH**  
two feet  
**— PLAYBOY**  
exo  
**— HIGH ENOUGH**  
k.flay  
**— HOUSE OF CARDS**  
bts  
**— MISTAKE**  
drug restaurant  
**— LOVE**  
taemin


	2. ONE |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ❝you keep dreaming and dark scheming❞

 

_“he always looks dazed..” hajoon trailed off, his eyes lingering over to the table in front of him where the man who made a mess of his life sat. his dark eyes were focused on said table, nothing special was happening, just him getting lost in his thoughts. hajoon sighed and looked back to his own group of friends. he couldn't shake the thought of him and that left a bad taste in his mouth. falling for him was the worst thing you can do on campus._

_meet lee jaehyeong. the man everyone is whipped for. he exudes the bad boy type with his leather jackets and slender frame. stoic is his middle name but dont let the occasional heart smile fool you. he has something hidden under that handsome face. all the pretty boys do._

_“get yourself together hajoon” dojoon, one out of his two friends snapped in his face to pull his attention back. hajoon flinched out of whatever daze he was in and gave out a sheepish smile, muttering a soft 'sorry.' dojoon sighed and gathered the scraps of his lunch back onto his tray. “i'll leave first, i have a project to finish at home.. woo you wanna come?”_

_woosung smiled softly at the nickname and nodded, “is that ok with you hajoon? if we leave?” he asked but the look in his eyes were hopeful and hajoon didn't want to ruin their fun. so he nodded and sent the love birds off, he was left to his lonesome once again. sighing, hajoon picked up his things and began to head out. as he was dumping his tray in the nearby trashcan he felt the eyes of someone watching him. hajoon froze and waited for it to leave but after a few seconds of the sensation still being there he turned around and was met with dark obsidian eyes that belonged to none other than lee jaehyeong_.


	3. TWO |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ❝youre a poison and i know that is the truth❞

_it was intoxicating with the way jaehyeong affected hajoon. it was like he was a drug that hajoon stupidly got addicted to. he couldn't get enough of him and it was the same for the other. it was comforting for hajoon.. it felt too comforting._

_gasps left hajoons mouth at the feeling of plush lips against his neck, sucking and biting with the hot pleasure coursing through his veins. he was weak under him and the only thing he could do was ball his hands up in his shirt. jaehyeong smirked at the sinful noises that left the smaller male. he let his lips trail from hajoons collarbones up to his neck and nose at his jawline where he continued to scatter blooming bruises onto hajoons pale skin._

_the pounding bass outside of the stuffy closet almost masked the breathy moans and deep groans from the two boys. jaehyeong wanted him to be louder, for his sweet voice to grace the tallers ears and send tingles down his spine. hajoon couldn't think straight, as a drunken haze clouded his only rational thoughts and he succombed to the overbearing sensations lee jaehyeong was giving him. jaehyeong trailed his hand up to hajoons head, entangling it and pulling his head away by his hair gently. he stepped back slightly from sucking hickeys onto hajoons neck and smirked as he saw how blown out and lidded hajoons eyes were. their lips were swollen, hair a mess and clothes wrinkled, jaehyeong thought he looked the most beautiful under the dim lighting. the two stayed like that for a while, just staring into eachothers eyes as they drank eachother in._

_one thing anyone could tell was that one of the boys were only in for it for the fun while the other had an almost longing look in his eyes. which is which is pretty obvious._


	4. THREE |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ❝all my friends think you're vicious  
> and they say you're suspicious❞

_"you really need to quit being around him..” woosung said and dojoon quickly agreed, hajoon sighed but nodded. he knew he should stop, but just uttering those words were hard. the three were walking side by side, woosung naturally taking the middle and leading them to a boba shop not too far from campus. finals were coming up quickly and the three boys needed some time to just relax before the impedding thought of all the studying and soon to be procrastination took place._

_“he isn't good for you... plus there's something fishy about him, i can feel it” dojoon added. hajoon knew his friends were just looking out for him, he knew that they only wanted the best for him but he'd be lying if it didn't hurt him. hajoon knew all of this. of course he did, he isn't that stupid. he started this game with the warnings playing through his head like a mantra. he stayed silent and let woosung bring them to a different topic, which probably has to do with the new album coldplay will be releasing soon._

_the three soon made it to their destination and walked in, they were regulars and the cashier waved to them with a smile. dojoon went up to her and ordered what they normally get while woosung went to find a seat with hajoon trailing behind him as per usual. they sat at a booth near the front window and watched as dojoon payed for their drinks and walked to them, two drinks skillfully wedged between his arm and torso while the other was held safely in his other hand. dojoon was always strange, he never wanted to use the cup holders fast food and cafes would give him. but it was all good as long as he didn't drop them._

_“one passion fruit boba for my passion,” dojoon said with a cheeky smile and wink directed to woosung and handed him his tea, “one coconut boba for a coocoo boy” he placed hajoons tea infront of him, a teasing smile gracing dojoons lips, “ and finally, a macha tea for the one and only.”_

_“you say that as if we dont order the same thing everytime,” hajoon said and took a sip of his boba, aiming for the balls, he's always liked to eat the orbs first then drink the tea. dojoon rolled his eyes and drank his boba instead of replying, woosung had layed his head on dojoons shoulder, his eyes closing and it was almost sickening how madly in love the two were. hajoon envied that._


	5. FOUR |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ❝you keep dreaming and dark scheming, yeah you do❞

_Shifty glances and little laughs were directed hajoons way during lunch, the tension in the air was thick around him. he was alone yet again, sitting at his normal table as he finished a paper that was due soon. dojoon and woosung didn't even bother to come to lunch, he last saw them running off through a hall and hajoon didn't want to think about what the two would be doing right now. he kept to himself and continued to write about the basics of anatomy. he couldn't hear the things the people sitting at jaehyeongs table were saying but he could almost feel the jokes they were making. hajoon felt the anxiety crawling up within him, he felt shaky and he knew he was gonna have a panic attack._

_he was always suffering from them ever since he was young._

_hajoon tried to focus on the task at hand and the soothing voice of danny d'onoghue but he couldn't help but think of what they were saying.. he silently prayed dojoon and woosung would be back soon.. or that jaehyeong would stand up for him. that was a silly thought and hajoon almost laughed at how idiotic he must sound._

_hajoon did the worst decision possible and glanced over to jaehyeong. his heart shattered when he saw him laughing along with his friends.. but he couldn't say he was suprised._

_it got too much for hajoon and he abruptly stood up, gathering his things as quickly as possible and almost bolting out of the cafeteria doors. he must have miscalculated his steps, though, and ended up tripping over his own two feet. his things flew out of his grip, papers and notebooks spiralling out onto the floor along with his phone which landed on the floor face first with a crack that resounded throughout the cafeteria. hajoon didn't dare look up, he let his line of sight stay on the hard linoleum floor. his hair sheilded his peripheral vision so he couldn't see the black shoes that were inevitably walking closer and closer until he could see the points in front of him. jaehyeong placed his finger under hajoons chin, letting a loose grip on it to gently tilt hajoons face up. he hated that his heart fluttered in that moment. he hated that it felt like time slowed down as he just gazed into jaehyeongs warm brown eyes. he hated how butterflys erupted in his stomach and he hated how short that feeling lasted._

_"hajoon, i asked if you're alright," jaehyeongs voice broke through the trance hajoon was put in and he could just feel his face being set ablaze. he sputtered out a quick reply of assurance and flinched back from jaehyeong._

_“hajoon! my baby are you okay? did anyone hurt you?” woosungs frantic words graced hajoons ears and hajoon felt so relieved when dojoon helped him get up._

_“I'm so sorry, I'm sorry that mean mean man had to touch you,” dojoon said and helped woosung with gathering hajoons stuff. hajoon couldn't help how his eyes were still set on jaehyeong._

 

_he tried to forget the smirk that made it's way on jaehyeongs face as he was leaving the cafeteria._


	6. FIVE |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ❝i feel like im drowning,  
> you're holding me down and,  
> you're killing me so slow❞

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably my darkest chapter yet so,, be warned lol

_constant, it was oh so constant, like a never ending cycle thats only purpose was to drive hajoon mad. he felt like he was suffocating everywhere he stepped._

_it was harder to focus on work._

_it took too much strength to talk to his friends._

_his feet dragged with every step he took to get to school._

_he was sinking._

_sinking in the toxicity of what he once called love._

_his friends noticed this, of course they did, they tried to help out. tried to distract him from the intrusive thoughts, woosung even went as far as doing hajoons work for him. but distractions wasn't what he needed, no._

_what hajoon needed was solace. he needed to confront jaehyeong and tell him to just stop messing with my head. but even being around him felt too overwhelming. hajoon could feel jaehyeong a mile away, his senses were hyperactive around the man and being near him had hajoon drowning in his scent. he hated that fact so much. he hated this so much. he hated himself so. much._

_but what could he do? he was trapped under a spell that he couldn't break. that wouldn't break._

_his grades were dropping, his friends faith in him was slowly dwindling. hell, his family barely contacted him since this whole mess started. hajoon had a feeling dojoon told them about the ordeal. hajoon would be furious if he had the strength to feel any emotion anymore. he just felt weak. he was weak for letting that man control him so easily. he was weak._

_weak._

_weak._

_so... so weak._

_hajoon cried more times he could count that night. he didn't have the energy to fight it anymore. so he succombed to the want. he called up jaehyeong and let him have his way with him._

_it felt good. but he knew it was only temporary._


	7. SIX |

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ❝you're so plastic and that's tragic❞

 

_he was faking it and anyone could tell. the sly glances, fleeting touches, small smirks. it was all an act but more and more people fed into it. he seemed to love the attention. no, scratch that, he did love the attention. he strived for it and would go out of his way to get it. jaehyeong was so fake and it made dojoon physically sick._

_dojoon had been friends with hajoon for as long as he could remember, they grew up together, shared everything with eachother. their similar names only furthered that. so seeing hajoon so helpless, oh boy did it get dojoons blood boiling. hajoon was always there for him, so dojoon felt like it was his turn to be there for hajoon._

_at first dojoon just wanted to go up to jaehyeong, punch him with all the frustrations that were pent up inside of him, tell jaehyeong to stay the fuck away from hajoon and leave it at that. but dojoons loving, soft boyfriend who only wanted the best for people, gave him a stern talking to and thus made a plan. granted, it wasn't a very good one but they'd do anything for hajoon._

_it was a slow tuesday when they decided to put the plan into action, hajoon wasn't at school that day since he apparently caught the stomach flu but the two boys knew the real reason why. they snuck around the campus like two people out of a very poorly made spy movie. the library they were in was huge, a pretty typical one honestly, and the huge glass windows let in natural sunlight that woosung would die to take a picture in. but his priorities were set and taking a bomb ass selfie would have to wait for another day._

_dojoon nudged woosung, snapping him out of his head and made a gesture towards jaehyeong. the man in question wasn't doing anything interesting, just looking through a few textbooks for a reason neither of them cared for._

_dojoon was suprised the guy even knew how to read._

_what they saw didn't shock them in the slightest but it still left a bitter taste in their mouth._

_jaehyeong was being approached but a couple of girls that they couldn't recognize, the scenario panned out how you'd expect it to._

_the girls were obviously flustered to be near jaehyeong, and even though he didn't show it, he was immensely annoyed by their presence. the first girl, who was so short and baby faced she looked like a freshmen at highschool, stammered her way through what was supposed to be a question about math. her friend who was much more mature looking, quickly swept in to save her poor friend._

_"what she's trying to say is that she likes you and would want to go on a study date." she said matter-of-factly, and her rude voice made even jaehyeong cringe._

_dojoon and woosung looked at each other from behind the book case, a curious glint in their eyes. slowly, turning back to jaehyeong and the girls._

_WHAP_

_cue woosung and dojoons whine in pain._

_"and who do you think you're spying on?" the aged voice from none other than the equally aged librarian sounded from behind the two. they turned around, rubbing their head in pain from getting whacked from the ruler the women was carrying._

_"we weren't spying on anyone! don't worry ms kim, ha ha," woosung nervously laughed, his hand grasping dojoons for dear life._

_the women tsked and reached down to grab ahold of their ears, pulling them up from their sitting position on the carpeted floor._

_"ow ow ow" they whined in unison._

_as they were getting dragged out of the library, jaehyeong took quick notice of this and grabbed his work before bolting away from the girls and towards the boys._

_he abruptly stopped when he got near them and fell into step almost perfectly with the two._

_"what the fuck do you want lee?" dojoon snapped, his mood plummeting the second jaehyeong came to them._

_"what's with the hostility park dojoon? what did I ever do to you?" jaehyeong smirked, going in-between the two and throwing his arms around them. he was already at an advantage by being taller._

_woosung recoiled away from the weight on his shoulders and tried to get away, but jaehyeong had a grip on his shoulder that limited the boys movements._

_"oh fuck off, i hated you the moment you messed with my friends head." dojoon bit back, his patience running low._

_"all of this, is hajoons choice. he wants me. not you. and it's going to stay that way the longer your stupid little friend believes i like him." jaehyeong said, loud and clear. his voice running cold. he pushed through them, walking a good distance infront of them before turning around, a sickening smirk plastered on his face._

_"remember this, love birds, i don't do relationships." and with that, he stalked off and around the corner of the street._

_it was then that they realized this wasn't going to end pretty._


	8. SEVEN |

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❝I don't know what the hell you gonna do  
> When your looks start depleting  
> And your friends all start leaving❞

_his world was in a downward spiral, twisting and turning down into a black abyss of all his wrong doings. he didn't know what to do, he tried to reach out but was met with a scowl from his so called friends. frantically, he looked around, only to be met with disgusted faces and stares filled with idium._

_karma really did come back to bite him in the ass._

_it was cruel how fast a simple tweet could spread so fast. how a few words and three screenshots could completely wreck a persons life. he knew he would be the most loathed person on campus, he knew that what he did wouldn't be looked past. but what he didn't know was that the people he called friends would leave him so quickly. they dropped him like a rotten apple. and at this point he might as well be classified as one._

_he didn't know that his thoughts would plague him as he tried to sleep, that when he'd get up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water and met eyes with his roommate that she'd look the other way and head to her room._

_call him stupid for thinking that the small parts of his life he took for granted would stay the same. call him naive for wanting to keep it the same. call him a dumbass for going back to his once friends and beg for forgiveness._

_it was pathetic and pitiful and just what he had coming._

_after five months of sitting alone during lunch, dark bags forming under his eyes and his once good looks depleting with every night he couldn't fall asleep._

 

_he left the school. jaehyeong le_ _ft the university and didn't look back. he was done with everything, anger pilling up inside him to the point he couldn't take it and just up and left._

 

_no one seemed to care, the student body didn't pay any mind to the once pretty boy popular switching schools. it was cruel, but it was what he deserved._


End file.
